What do we mean by the simple word “love”? Do we mean passion? Affection? Lust? Attachment? Friendship? And how could love be so many different things to different people, and even to one person at many different times?
Psychoanalysts have long been divided over the question of whether to condemn love as a form of self-deception or as the greatest of all psychical accomplishments. The situation becomes far more complex when, instead of simply giving love the thumbs-up or thumbs-down, we raise the thorny question, “What is Love?” But an all-encompassing theory of love is not possible and probably not even desirable! Instead, we will develop further a deeper appreciation for the complexity of the human experience of love and passion, relying on Lacan’s registers of the Symbolic, the Imaginary, and the Real.
“Love is giving what you don’t have.”
This claim by Lacan will be explored from several perspectives, as will the notion that in love, we don’t simply give what we don’t have; we love other people for what they don’t have. We love them for their foibles, failings, defects, inabilities, and insecurities. In a word, we love them, not in spite of their warts, but because of their warts. Time permitting, Lacan’s later glosses on love, including smoldering and “hainamoration,” will be laid out.
Learning Objectives:
As a result of attending this session, participants should be able to:
Explain what is meant by Lacan’s thesis, “love is giving what you don’t have”
Summarize the many facets of what we mean by the word “love”
Describe three different ways Lacan thinks about love, from the standpoints of the three registers of the Symbolic, the Imaginary, and the Real
Discuss how love involves loving “the partner’s ‘warts’” (or flaws or defects)
Compare the differences between love, desire, and jouissance
Explain why Freud says it is impossible to “love thy neighbor”
Explain three reasons, according to Freud and Lacan, why we distrust love on the one hand and idealize it on the other
There will be a 90-minute break for lunch from 11:45 am – 1:15 pm. (If attending in person, a list of area restaurants will be available.)
